Mexican Fisherman Story

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I've been spending a bit of time talking to Dale recently about life, careers, and where we both want to end up in the next few years. During one of our recent iChats, I was reminded of this Mexican Fisherman Story I heard a few years ago and managed to track it down. After I showed it to Dale he suggested I post it up here, because it has a fairly important message in it. An American tourist was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The tourist complimented the Mexican on the quality ...

The iPad Will Change How I Go To The Bathroom

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It's true. Sure, it might not have flash, and it might not come with 3G by default. But really, do any of those things matter when you're sitting on the porcelain god? I think not. Obviously a laptop is too big to take into the can. Well, at least I hope nobody is taking the laptop into the can (Dan Lilly, that means you buddy). That leaves the iPhone or the iPad. iPhone works decent, but really, there are usually a variety of pads in the can, so might as well add one more. It's pretty easy to use the iPhone with one hand while grabbing some TP with the other. I imagine one will have to come up ...

The Coffee Commandments

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Some random thoughts of mine from a coffee shop. Thou shalt know thy order before approaching the counter Thou shalt not hog the cream station for extended periods of time Thou shalt wipe up thy coffee mess after a spill Thou shalt not prefix thy coffee order with more than three descriptive words Thou shalt not setup a laptop on a table for six when drinking alone Thou shalt not order any item that cannot be reliably pronounced Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's coffee barista Thou shalt not order the devil's brew - "non fat, no-foam, extra hot latte" Thou shalt not put 5 cent syrup ...

French Fry Bag

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I was catching up on Tony's site tonight and stumbled across this photo of Tony from 2006. Apparently he ended up on Hot Chicks With Douche Bags back then, which I think is awesome. Tony spends his days injecting massive amounts of awesome into the LA Times as the head of their 40-some odd blogs, and his nights attending cool music and social events in Los Angeles, so I think it's pretty funny he'd end up there. But hey, getting your photo taken with a cute girl is always a good thing. I hung out with Tony for New Year's out in Toronto last year, and we had a lot of fun drinking beer and sitting ...

The Boxer Brief

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So, this in this day and age this is probably a rhetorical post. I imagine most guys wear boxer shorts these days, and I typically do as well. That being said, I couldn't find any that were clean this morning so I was forced to put on a pair of briefs that were hiding in my closet. Surprisingly, they are far comfier than I remembered. It sort of feels like I've just reunited with an old childhood friend. Even though that friend is going to go away as soon as the laundry machine spins back up, it's bound to be a good visit. ...

A Day In The Life

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I actually hit the sack before midnight last night, which is pretty much an unprecedented event in my life. The main reason was because I had to get up early and take my car into the shop to get some TLC. While on my road trip a few weeks ago, a few things suddenly stopped working, including the door lock switch on the driver's side door, the CD player (it currently does a better job grinding CDs then it does playing them), and a small problem with my gear shifter. In addition, my car is about one year past the date I should have had a one year tune-up. In terms of the last item, it's a weird ...

What Constitutes a Rick Roll?

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So, this is a fairly basic question. Lately, some people have been installing little rick roll blockers, thinking that it somehow protects them from being rick rolled simply because the video no longer plays. My take on that is that it's basically a form of cheating, and that if you clicked the link, you were rick rolled. But let's see what my knowledgeable readers have to say. Chime in below: [poll=12] ...

Russell Peters

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I had a few beer tonight, and ended up stumbling across this Russell Peters video. This guy is awesome. I, quite literally, walked into the guy at the Juno awards a few weeks ago. I nearly knocked him over while leaving the media room. PS - Media Temple just barfed again, and I'm still running. ...

This Is Awesome

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When adult chat time doesn't quite go as expected: From here. ...

Stick It To The Little Guys

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I love stories like this. Starbucks has just been ordered to pay $100 million worth of cash that was taken out of their employees' tip jars and given to managers and shift supervisors. It always boggles my mind how establishments like that routinely try and screw their employees, many of which are making minimum wage. My teen years were pretty much filled with an endless string of shitty jobs. First, there was Bonanza, an interesting establishment that tried to cross fast-food with grilled steak, the result of which probably kept the local hospital busy with food poisoning cases. Like Starbucks, ...

Everybody Needs Their Own GUID

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That's the phrase of the day people. I was debating a hard problem at work with a few people and after banging our heads on the table for 30 minutes, Cisco interjected "everyone really should have their own GUID." Yes that would be a rather perfect solution, albeit fairly nerdy. Some day. ...

New Mac Desktop

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Tomorrow I should be getting a brand new 8-core MacPro for my desk at work. In honor of that, I did up a little Mac desktop last night for anyone who likes to laugh from time to time. Enjoy. digg_url = 'http://www.digg.com/apple/The_MacPro_When_Seven_Cores_Of_Porn_Doesn_t_Quite_Cut_It'; ...

Busted

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So I'm currently at my mom's place looking at her new computer. While checking out her new monitor, she spilled the goods: Mom: "Hey, you know that blog entry about people getting to your blog by googling duanestorey.com" Me: "Yah" Mom: "Don't tell anyone, but it was us.. That's what we do" So there you have it. My mom needs a few lessons in how to browse the web. I still love her though. Even though it means I might be adopted. ...

A Journey Through Stupidity

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digg_url = 'http://digg.com/apple/This_is_why_the_world_hates_Microsoft'; So tonight (after a bit of wine) I decided to blow my hotmail account away completely and never look back. Unfortunately, as soon as I tried the circus music started playing and the adventure truly began. Step 1, tell hotmail to go fuck itself. This involves telling hotmail to close down my account. While fucking itself. Oh no! Danger Wil Robinson! Cannot close down your account. Apparently there's some Microsoft mail thing associated with my account, and I have to close that down first. Not a prob. I'll gladly fuck over ...

Screw By Wire, A Strip Show At 40,000 Feet

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Curious to know what happens in the cockpit on French airlines when your dinner is being served? You might have though that the pilots were busy doing complicated fuel calculations, or checking safety systems. Think again! The stewardesses are coming up from and putting on a little strip show for the pilots. Added union incentives no doubt. Makes me wish I would have gone to pilot school. You can read more about the strip show here. I'm guessing that lady is in need of a new job. ...

Duanelander

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Yes, this is what I look like before I cut off your head and steal all your powers, bitches. Big thanks to Clay for misusing all our web design resources at work to make this possible. Apparently he thought the whole Star Wars thing was too retro, and came up with something better. Thanks for supporting my cause against the evil guys against me, dude. Watch out for my sword. PS - I'm commando under all that shit. Believe it. Also, tomorrow is a big nerd session at my place. John Bollwitt, Boris Mann and John Biehler are definitely swinging by to drink some beers, watch some movies, and play catch-up ...

Better Ways To Get To My Blog

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I went through my google analytics this morning for a few minutes. The one thing that surprised me was those of you who somehow get to my site by typing "duanestorey.com" into a google search. If you are part of the 219 people who did that last month, here's a little tip for you. Up top in your browser is a little white thing we like to call the "Address Bar". You can simply go up there and type in either "duanestorey.com" or "www.duanestorey.com" into it and press enter, which should immediately take you to my website. You're more than welcome to use the ...

How To Be A Winner

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Eight easy steps: 1. Toss and turn all night 2. Fall asleep at 5am 3. Get up at 9:30am and try to head to work 4. Call a cab, and tell him to take you to work 5. Pay cab driver. Drop money all over the cab and look dumb. 6. Exit cab and close door, making sure to slam your iPod touch in the door 7. Stand there looking at iPod touch drive away with cab driver, only to fall off a half block away 8. Pick up iPod touch on the concrete, now without headphones ...

Tim Conway Elephant Story

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My dad showed me this over the Christmas break, and I thought it was pretty funny. Check it out. ...

Drunken Stupidity

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Not many people who read this will get the joke, but I find this funny for multiple reasons. From xkcd.com ...